Tag Archives: the Oscars

Episode 164: A New Cinematic Universe Has Entered the Chat: Oscar Buzz Edition

The glitz. The glam. The nanobots pouring through your blood, erasing your memories while programming you to be the most dangerous hitman on the planet. Now you have to track down all the Academy members whose crimes you used to protect in order to take them out as you learn more and more about your gold-plated past. This summer, Vin Diesel will take down the Hollywood elite the only way he knows how: in a sleeveless shirt. But wait, who is this, lurking in the shadows of a derelict building? Is that… is that Jared Leto? And why is he…covered in blood? Oh he’s a vampire now? Huh. Well, okay. Suddenly, from the bushes emerges one of the world’s greatest heroes known the world over for his courage, bravery, and skills with a bow. That’s right. It’s Turok: Dinosaur Hunter, here to save the world from Dinosaurs once again. The Valiant Comics Cinematic Universe (and Morbius from the Venonverse) is primed and ready to explode onto the red carpet tonight as we honor a bunch of white men for their incredible achievements in film. Also Henry has a new music conspiracy theory and an update from his life featuring Chili’s. ALL HERE ON ZERO CREDIT(S).

Episode 119: Sober Sunday

The sun is high in the sky and the boys are high dry. It’s Sober Sunday in the Zero Credit(s) Studio (apartment), the holiest of holy days where no one gets drunk, no ways. In this blistering light, there’s only one thing to talk about. DC’s hit television show [citation needed] Legends of Tomorrow featuring all your favorite possibly fake plot lines that end up being real. People sat in a room around a table and discussed these plot lines and decided, yes, these are the ones we are going to put on television for people to see. I don’t care if it’s technically borrowing ideas from Back to the Future 2, I want Caesar to break into a history museum to steal a Roman Sports Almanac so he can make tons of that sweet, sweet Roman dosch. And without the beers, there’s more room for more content in the bellies of your ears! The Oscars are happening again (for some reason) and this time, the scandals are happening BEFORE the actual show (this is always the case, I do not know why Henry insisted on emphasizing the “before,” also I am 110% sure we’ve made this joke already). What’s the scandal? Who’s involved? Do you already know it? Odds are you don’t, because literally no one cared. It’s all here, it’s all beer, wait no it’s not, on Zero Credit(s): Sunday Edition!