Monthly Archives: November 2018

Episode 117: Thaaanks



The autumn leaves have fallen and it’s cold everywhere you look–WEATHER UPDATE: Today’s Forecast in Austin, TX, is gonna be HOT HOT HOT. 70° High with no chance for cold anywhere throughout the day. We return you to your normally scheduled podcast description–the snow is falling and the boys are feeling ever so thankful for the things that have changed in their lives in the past year. It’s time to come together and give a hearty and full-bellied “thaanks.”

 

And then it gets all anti-capitalism and communistic and just becomes a normal episode of the podcast. I mean. The boys tried to keep it apolitical/a-economical. They really did.


Episode 116: Medieval Death Bot Meets World



With nothing left to lose in the world in the wake of the midterm elections, John and Henry travel back in time to meet their maker. Several hundred times. Cause when you’re an immortal time traveling duo of know-nothings, there’s nothing like the soothing feeling of being stabbed and overpowered by three other men in the dusty, disgusting alleys of middle age England. Or wherever the Dark Ages happened. Price of knife, 1 shilling. Henry then drinks way too much Andy Gator and tries to ruin everything John has planned. And succeeds? Hm. Who is to say? You should find out. By listening. To the episode.


Episode 115: Drunk Midterms Live-ish



Spoiler alert, we get political.

It’s election night in America and Henry and John are champing at the bit to spit their particular political opinions all over your ears. Yeah, it’s gross. This is politics. It tends to get gross. Nothing is held back. Political parties are dropped into pits. Politicians are dragged across the coals. Candidates are lifted up the mountain to be dropped off the other side. Voting is the real battlefield and the war zone is littered with the corpses of democracy. And at the center of this is a healthy serving of “fuck Ted Cruz” dished up by your local artisan rant-chef John. The boys are drinkin’ and thinkin’ and the Zeitgeist is a horrible demon to have on your shoulder when politics rolls around.

But fear not, my child-fams. There is a shining beacon of hope in all this darkness. Shrek is getting rebooted. And there’s nothing more pure in the world than an ogre voiced by Mike Myers.


Episode 114: Frightentimes 2: Finale: Ted the Caver



Have you ever wanted to willingly put yourself in a space so small that all you can do is wiggle your shoulders to move forward? Have you ever wanted to be in a situation where squeezing through a small space is the only way to explore where you’re going, knowing that to get back you’ll have to squeeze through that same small passage? Feel like risking your life for the sake of seeing something not many get to see personally because if something goes wrong you may die over the course of days, alone in the dark, as you slowly starve to death?

What am I saying, OF COURSE YOU DO. Caving is such a fun activity that it’s now mandatory. Hop in a cave, break your legs, and slowly lose your humanity to the darkness within. Who knows what you’ll crawl out as. A demons? A bats? Some rock? It’s all a mystery to us, but soon you’ll know pretty much gosh darn fucking everything there is to know about the dangers of just standing in a cave. Not even walking. Just standing in a cave could kill you. It’s dangerous to go alone, and watch your step cause that’s just a 30 foot drop in the floor for no reason and you have to jump over it to go further. Yeah, it’s just there. Sheer drop, 30 feet. Probably spikes at the bottom too cause why wouldn’t there be?

Caves. They’ll murder you without a second thought.

 

Music:
Unseen Horrors, Welcome to HorrorLand
Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/