The failing football industry can rest easy tonight, as the goddess and patron saint of capital and monetization is here to save it. Taylor Swift attended a football game. This is news. This is such news that we brought on the Zero Credit(s) resident Xpert to talk about it. That and more, right here on Zero Credit(s).
That’s right. Another year, another attempt to use the Big Game as a litmus test of cultural happenings. Does it ever really work? Eh, who is to say? All we know is the game was kind of boring and the commercials were also kind of boring. And in the middle of a pandemic, is it worth gathering 25,000 fans and who knows how many personnel into one close-quarters area for the sake of a kind of boring game? Probably not. Probably wasn’t worth it all, if we’re being honest. Like, we would get more value out of something else that cost this amount of money, to be sure. But all we have is beer and football to show for our efforts. Plus we break down most of the commercials! It’s all here on Zero Credit(s).
What up Sports Survivors, it’s hike time on the Zero Credit(s) Grid Iron and the New England Footballs are roarin’ to go up against the St. Lou–Los Angeles Helmeted-Men. In the aftermath, no one is left pleased, save for a small community of people on the East Coast who have literally never known pain, for they have lived in the golden era of summer that is the blandest team in football. I mean, if you’re a fan of the New England Sucktriots, then fine. Feel free to continue living your fucking privileged life where suffering is a word in a book seldom read. For the rest of us, we’ll just continue living our shit pain lives of misery, while Brady struggles to lift his precious robot hands due to the weight of six way-too big rings that honestly look kind of dumb. We wouldn’t one anyway. Also television is dead, no one tried, and corporations are awful, translucent money goblins whose thin intentions are as easily read as that aforementioned suffering book. Mixed metaphors and amateur sports analysis overflow in this episode. Cause that’s what you signed up for.
The great Foot Ball Sunday Day is an event that happens but once every year, Dear Listener, and the ZC Boys could not be more excited to cover all the great events surrounding the Big Game. Not the game itself, mind, just the events surrounding it. We’re talking the commercials, the advertisements, the …third word for commercials. It’s a commercial heavy episode of Zero Credit(s), but the only thing we’re selling is a quick look into the cultural pulse of the nation. Also, Europe’s being overrun by a mutant crawfish. That’s not a joke or anything, it’s just something that is currently happening and Henry’s got all the details to enlighten us before it all ends in a river, where no one can here you blub. Strap yourself down for some edification, Zero Credit(s) starts as soon as you hit the play button yourself, we can’t do that for you. Oh man, if we could though. Boom, everywhere. Everywhere you look, people would be listening to Zero Credit(s), whether they like it or not, endlessly, forever. Enjoy!